


Dawn of a New Life

by Goldenwolfmidna



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Adora is Oblivious and Optomistic, Catra's an anxious guilty CHILD, F/F, Perfuma is a good therapist, Swearing, after season 5, catra swears yes, more tags will be added, probably written late at night which is like noon for me
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-30
Updated: 2020-05-30
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:53:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,420
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24453205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Goldenwolfmidna/pseuds/Goldenwolfmidna
Summary: [SEASON 5 SPOILERS]After defeating Horde Prime, Catra gets to stay at Bright Moon. Unfortunately for her, though, she may be tolerated, but not liked or accepted, and memories of all that she did haunt her.
Relationships: Adora/Catra (She-Ra)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 21





	Dawn of a New Life

**Author's Note:**

> wow look someone binged all of she-ra from season 3 on in 2 nights and DIED because Catadora is CANON AAAAAAAA  
> \--  
> ..I liked it. As a gay, I liked that we got a gay cartoon directed towards children.

I open my eyes, shaking my far-too-short hair. Light falls onto my face, illuminating the body of a human woman sitting in a very comfortable looking chair on the other side of a room, asleep.

Blinking, I remember it’s all over- I’m not a prisoner anymore. I- Queen Glimmer gave me a room here. The spare room they held _HER_ in.

_Why'd she sacrifice herself for me? And- I mean, I get why for Adora, but why me? I-_

I sit up, and the bed tries to swallow me again. Flailing a little, I manage to escape its clutches without ripping anything to shreds.

“Hey, Adora.” I call, and the human stirs.

“Huh-wha- Catra?” Adora’s eyes open as she looks at me. “What’re you- Oh. Right. We did it.”

“Heh. Yeah. We did.” I grin. “Really, _I_ did it. If you’d have gone alone, you’d be- we’d all be gone.” The teasing tone leaves my voice with the last few words as I look away.

_We’d all be dead because of my mistake. Because I didn’t trust Entrapta with the portal._

“Yeah. Thanks.” Adora gets out of the chair, walking over to me, and closes her hand over mine. “I mean it.”

“No problem, magical girl.” The snark is back, along with a smirk to match. “So. Why’re you here? In my room, that is. Not at Bright Moon.”

“I wanted to make sure you were feeling okay. I- I know it happened three days ago. But still. You- we were so close to losing. And- and I know that you were kidnapped. And chipped.” She moves to embrace me, which I’d normally worm my way out of, but since it’s her and I can hear the concern, I don’t move. Her hand touches the raw skin on the back of my neck where the Horde chip tapped into my nervous system, and I bite my lip to keep from flinching.

“I have Melog. I’d be fine.” I sound dismissive to my own ears and add, “but I do appreciate it. Thanks, Adora.” An arm awkwardly moves around her.

“Are- wow. You’re hugging someone back.” Now she’s the one teasing me, and my face reddens in embarrassment.

“No- no I’m not.”

“But you _are_!”

“N- shush.” From the corner of my eye, I see Melog stir from the pile of discarded cushions that they had formed into their little ‘nest’. They tilt their head at me in a manner showing their intrigue, then go back to sleeping.

“Soooooo. You wanna do anything today?” Adora pulls away from me- _nope I don’t mind I don’t like hugs_ \- and her eyes gleam in the light.

A mischievous smile plays across my face. “What do you have in mind?”

“How much of Bright Moon have you seen?”

“My room? The throne room? Kitchen?” I list off what I can remember- I’ve been spending a lot of time up in my room.

 _Crying and moping, instead of being a good person- which, really, you aren’t. All you did was get through to Adora- once. That’s_ one _good thing._

“Hm. C’mon, follow me.” With that, my arm is grabbed and I’m running after Adora, who clearly has somewhere she wants me to see.

A garden.

“A garden?” I breathe in. “Adora- why’d you drag me halfway across Bright Moon to see _plants_?”

The human’s eyes fall to the floor at my question- _don’t do that, Catra, it hurts her_ \- and she mumbles, “it was Shadow Weaver’s. Um. Thought you may want to see.”

_oh._

“Oh. I-” I’m overcome with a flood of emotions about that woman- rage, frustration, failure, being _nothing_ , failure, _I’m a failure, I’m a failure I’m a failure_ . Buzzing fills my ears as the thought cycles around in my head in her voice- _you’re a failure, you're a failure_ . My eyes are squeezed shut, showing me the memory of her dying to save us- _to save me_ \- as the words continue bouncing around -

Hands dig into my shoulders as I’m forced back to reality. “Catra!” Adora’s standing in front of me, I know it despite the hands covering my eyes- more like digging into.

“I’m okay.” _God fucking- control yourself, you failure. They have enough going on._

_Didn’t Perfuma say something about therapy? And being willing to talk? She did. I’ll go talk to her later, I guess._

I don’t feel any tears on my face, so I remove my hands and look at Adora. She’s cute as ever, and though I still deny it, she has an odd way of knowing it’s not true.

Because I may have kissed her.

And I may want to again. A lot.

“I’m okay.” I repeat, pushing her arms off me and turning away. “Just- need some space.” Without waiting to see if she follows, I turn and begin walking back to my room.

The grass against my mostly bare feet feels good, how my claws dig into it and it yields slightly. And how the marble Bright Moon is made of makes a _click_ ing sound as I walk across it.

\--

“Perfuma?” I open the door the guards directed me to. It’s covered in vines and the faint smell of tea comes from it.

“Hm? Yes?” The tall Princess looks towards the door. And me. “Oh. Hello, Catra. Why are you in my room?” Her voice is touched with a note of concern, fear, if you will. I understand why, but I don’t like it.

“I- um. A while ago, you said something about therapy? And abandonment issues? And- um. I- I think I’m ready to talk a little.” I step into the room cautiously, fully aware of how much right the flowery Princess has to dislike me.

“Oh. Yes. If you want to talk about it, I’d be happy to listen.” Perfuma smiles. “Come over here, we have chairs.”

“Um, alright.” I walk over to the aforementioned chair and sit down. Perfuma sits in another near me.

“So, what do you want to talk about.” The Princess says, looking me over- _judging if I’m a threat_. “We could talk about your abandonment issues, your obvious lack of self-esteem, your discomfort in being here. Something I didn’t mention.”

“I- I just want to tell someone about how guilty I feel. For all of this.” I gesture around, indicating the Portal incident and the Heart of Etheria and just _everything_.

Perfuma nods. “I thought so. I’m here to listen.”

“I just- I’m so scared I’m going to fuck it all up for you guys, for my last chance at life. Make it so we unleash some other intergalactic horror.” I give an insane laugh, the stress finally having an outlet. “Just- I was the one to fuck it all up before, y’know? And so I could do it again? And just- the Horde soldiers still hate me. Like? My oldest friends? All want me to go die. I can’t even blame them. I was an ass to Lonnie and Kyle last time we spoke, and I never knew what Rogelio was saying. And still? Adora barely even likes me.”

Perfuma cuts me off there. “That's.. Quite a lot. I believe that if you spoke to the old Horde soldiers, you may find they are more willing to accept you. And if Horde Prime-” we both wince a little at the memories the name brings up- “ is to be trusted, he was the ruler of the universe. And there are no others.”

“Yeah, I guess.” I shrug.

“Catra, I’d like to add that Adora likes you. All of us Princesses acknowledge the risk you put yourself through to get our Queen back, and save Etheria. Do not discount your role in this all.”

“Yeah- but I was the one to _cause the problems!_ ” I’m mad- and then calm myself down. “Sorry.” 

“It’s okay to feel things, Catra. I hope you know that.” Perfuma says. “I understand the Horde discouraged it, but it is okay.”

“They didn’t discourage it- it was a _WEAKNESS!_ I could have _DIED_ if I felt.” I glare at the Princess. “I- I should go. Sorry.”

I push myself out of the chair, walking out the door and shutting it behind me with a whispered “thanks, Princess.”

\--

When I get back to my room, I’m alone. Slamming the heavy door behind me, I scramble up the walls to sit on the windowsill, tuck my knees to my chest and put my forehead to that, wrapping my arms around me, and start to cry.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments are loved!!  
> Same with kudos!!


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